Hallo everyone. I hope you are all good. No matter how you feel now, come with me. Let us do this together. Let us inhale deeply, allow the oxygen travels throughout your body and exhale, let go the tension, the sorrow and whatever negative aura off your body. Repeat this until you feel relax…. And smile to the world, they will be smiling back at you. Just imagine that, you feel better that way. Forget a while of what surrounds you… Come, read this ;).

It has been a month since I wrote my first post in this blog. I never expected that I would become a regular writer. I have become addictive in blog writing. This is funny, and it is like writing a journal that I used to enjoy doing many years ago, not a scientific journal of course. Irony, I do not have even one in that scientific journal. Soon, Insyallah..  Some of my friends said ‘you will come to the point when you are lazy to update’. Well, we will see. When I fed up with my analysis, I feel I would rather change my profession to be a blog writer…hahhaha. Probably, when I have to focus more on my Phd writing, I would have less time to update but I could feel that this is going to be my best friend now on.

I think writing is a good way to express the feeling at that moment, the thought that triggers my perception towards an occurrence and the life lesson that I could learn from that. Everyday, we walk on the path of life with different kind of feeling. Sometimes, we laugh, we cry, we smile, we freeze, we hurt, and those feeling would never last. It is like a cycle. That is life, so called. Often ups and downs take their turn. The question is how we cope and deal with that.

I am interested in writing about my life, my journey. Some are the stories of the current episode, some are my thoughts of something I see, some are tips to share and some are the stories that come from the memories I dig from some part of my brain. Mostly by an event that triggers the memories. Every time, I walk down the memory lane, I still could feel what it was liked. Many were sweet, great and wonderful, little were just too painful to remember. Like it was just happened yesterday. And those scars may likely be bleeding again. Whatever the feeling was, I could never change that. Instead, I always pray that I could learn something from there. At least, those memories have created who I become today, that has brought me this far.

I will walk my life with all the courage I gained from the past experiences. I believe the experiences when I fell and failed, brought me closer to define whom I really am or was. I realize Allah gave me so many trials, so that I could appear strong and be endurance one. And to Him, I asked for help and strength and forgiveness too. I am not a perfect human being, I made mistake from time to time. And to Him I seek guidance, to the righteous path. He is the Creator of the universe, we have planned many in life but He has His plan for us too. He knew better than we do. For that, I am grateful even it hurts me the most.

I do not know how much longer will I live in this world. I have so many persons that I love, my family, my friends and someone. They have completely enriched my life. I want them to know that they mean so much to me. And, I love them so greatly. If I died before they do, I want them to remember me as someone good, a person that is close to their heart, as they are to mine. So that, when I am gone, they will feel I am still with them smiling, laughing and teasing. And when I am gone, they will send me Al-fatihah every time they read my stories that are close to them. And if I happen to get married again, I will do the best in my power to be a good wife and mum. Later in the future, my kids and my grandchild could read this too and be proud of me. Insyallah..

In this opportunity, I want to apologize if there is any in the writings or pictures that might hurt your feeling whilst I do not mean to do so. I speak my thought, my understanding and it is my point of view to express the stories of my life based on the experience I have been through. I wish the stories were not just stories but a life lesson and motivation to us all. Insyallah. Thank you and cheers! Wassalam.

Happy reading!

Jazz Aziz
28 April 2011